אכפתיות (Caring)

1 Timothy 5:8 New King James Version (NKJV)

But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

One of the most important things in my life right now is looking after my spouse that suffers with Focal segmental glomerulosclerosis (FSGS).  It is a leading cause of kidney failure in adults. And it is often described as scarring (sclerosis) of the kidneys. My focus has never been so much on the disease that he has been burdened with because we are all dying. I get distracted by the complexities that my emotions often get caught up in. At that point I have to bring them under submission and focus on what God says in terms of how to get through this season of our lives.

I am not going to lie to you, caring for a love one is not easy. It requires a lot of prayer and at times you have to have someone pray for you as well. One of the things that have helped me in this journey is talking to other women who have cared for their husbands during their illness. This brings a great comfort knowing that there is someone who has gone through what you are going through; in essence you are not alone. But more importantly, you can cry, fuss and pray with them and leave with a sense of renewed strength that you can take back with you as you provide care, support and love for your companion. And I am truly thankful for these women that I lean on.

Nevertheless, every day, I pray that God touches my spouse, heals him, and gives him strength to get through the day. I pray in his will that we both hold each other up and lean on one another. His word states in Mark 10:8 NKJV and the two shall become one flesh’; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh. So this journey is not just for him but for me as well. What affects my spouse affects me in every way. So the tools that God has given me to focus on are: love, joy, peace, forbearance, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Sometimes I fail miserably in these things. But I continue to try to implement these things until it is automatic within my actions. But I do understand that I am pleasing God when I use these fruits of the spirit and love on my husband during this season in our lives.